little_flower_e (little_flower_e) wrote,

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The candle dances

Sorry for being morbid, the candle speaks to me.......

What can you really do when you find out so much of what you thought you knew is not what you thought it was? So much you desperately wanted to believe in is destroyed? When so many single events are relayed in an impossible variety, when the solid ground and walls of truth are nowhere to be found, when you find yourself freefalling through an uncertain misty darkness?

Can the past strip off your flesh in small, agonizing pieces? Can it pull out your heart so slowly you can feel the nauseating torture of veins there attached stretch, and tear as they slide through the muscles? How many days can you endure this repetition? Can you run out of tears before you run out of pain?

Can you hide these daily deaths from everyone? Can you embrace this tormenting distress until it leaves you? Can you pretend to be ok until you really are ok? Can you accept that you’ll never know the truth and take to heart that it truly doesn’t matter? That you were meant for something wonderful you cannot begin to foresee, cannot yet even comprehend? That you are a beautiful entity, that even though it doesn’t feel like it yet, the wind rushing past you in freefall will someday in the distant future, take you far away, to a better, happier, pain free place? 
Can you?


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